Saturday, 25 August 2012

a moment of honesty

Quote by Azar Nafisi / Found Here
I stumbled across this quote here a while back and it has pretty much been on my heart ever since. If you are new around here you may not know that I have just relocated to the USA. Long story short: I am from England, then I lived in the USA for a couple of years, then back to England for one, then The Netherlands for one, and now I am back in the USA in Boise Idaho. This photo was taken during my freshers week of University in The Netherlands - such a great season of life that I am having trouble moving on from. It goes without saying that change is hard. But, I find it gets harder when people are involved - when relationships are formed and deepened it makes leaving a place and moving to another all the more harder. I have had days here in the USA when I can not control the crying. Being honest here. It really does break my heart some mornings to wake up and realize I can not just open my door and see my old University dorm neighbors. It breaks my heart that I do not know when I shall see them again and I hate the frustration that comes from talking on skype and not being able to really be with a person. It's tough. In fact, I think it is the toughest thing that I have ever had to walk through. In the Bible, Jesus says, "Blessed are those who mourn". Why? Because those who mourn have truly loved and experienced love in their lives. I know I complain and complain about how hard it was to move from The Netherlands and I cry over missing my friends, but when I consider the alternative (being super happy to leave a place where I had no meaningful relationships) I realize I wouldn't want that. I am so blessed and honored to have met the people I did and to have become such good friends with some really amazing people.

I am in a new season. There is a lot of excitement to be starting a new University and to be back in Boise where I have great friends already and where I am making more. It is tough, not going to lie. And please don't get me wrong - I chose the change and I trust that the change is going to bring joy in time and for that I am grateful. But it is still tough. Because of this I may be posting a little less regularly as I get use to things around here over the next week or so. Thank you to all y'all who send me sweet, encouraging and reassuring emails....they really bless me and the thought that you take time to email me seriously makes my day.

Happy Weekend!

6 comments:

Katie said...

I definitely relate to this post a lot. When I moved to Illinois 6 years ago from England I had many days when I would spend all day crying. Mourning my "old life." I also had many times when I would retell a funny story and one minute be cracking up laughing and the next minute crying. That was weird. I had never read that quote before, but it is so true. Hope things get easier for you :)
Katie
abritandheryank.blogspot.com

Bailey@Lost&Found said...

Thinking of you :) one day at a time...

Ruby said...

Lovely post, Sally. As someone who has upped roots and crossed continents more times than I care to count, I too have repeatedly faced this dilemma. And I have repeatedly come to the same conclusion. The old adage that it is 'better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all' is true in a much broader sense than purely romantic.

Theresa.Like,totally said...

Good luck with your getting used to everything. The beginning is always the hardest, after a while it becomes easier. Hope you are having lots of fun the next few days (and even more after that of course)!
xxx

Alex Butts said...

I just pinned that quote photo from your blog - I know exactly what you mean. I'm back here because I like who I am here

Shireen McCleary said...

Big change is never easy! It's hard to move and leave behind great friends and relationships especially when you don't know when you'll see them again. I relate to this post 100% and I think you're being quite strong and brave about it! Take your time, enjoy the friendships you have around you, and if all else fails, start looking at plane tickets to the Netherlands for a reunion vacation :) Hope things perk up love!